You Are More Than a Lable

You Are More Than a Label

By Locke Curfman, LPC, Co-Clinical Director

Have you ever been called a certain “type” of person?

Maybe someone once pegged you as “the smart one,” or “the anxious one,” or “the one who’s always messing things up.” Maybe you’ve even labeled yourself—“I’m an introvert,” “I’m not a people person,” or “I’m just damaged.”

Some of those labels might hold a kernel of truth. After all, we’ve all had clever moments and foolish ones. But the danger comes when a passing label starts to feel like a permanent identity.

Words matter. And labels, especially when spoken by someone we trust—or when repeated often enough—can start to shape our expectations. And expectations? They shape behavior. They shape relationships. They shape our sense of what’s possible.

When Labels Stick Too Long

I’ve worked with many clients who believed their labels more deeply than they believed their worth. One might say, “I’m a depressive,” as though it defines them. Another might internalize failure in one subject—say science—and conclude, “I’m just not smart.” One mistake, one hard season, and suddenly the whole self is covered by the label.

Labels can shrink our world. They can hold us back from healing and growth. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” — Proverbs 4:23

Framing Reality Shapes Experience

In psychology, there’s this idea that how we frame reality shapes how we experience it. A brilliant example of this is from a 2018 study (Carson, Langer, & Flodr): cancer survivors who believed they were “cured” did significantly better—emotionally, socially, even physically—than those who said they were “in remission.” Same health status. But one group had hope; the other, lingering uncertainty.

In another study, those who refused to fully identify with a disease—like cancer, depression, or alcoholism—tended to recover more fully than those who saw the diagnosis as part of who they were. (Golub, 2004)

This isn’t about denying reality. It’s about refusing to let a diagnosis become your name.

It reminds me of Jesus’ question to the man at the pool of Bethesda in John 5: “Do you want to be well?” A strange question, unless you understand how hard it can be to shed an identity—even one rooted in pain. Sometimes we become so accustomed to our limitations that healing feels unfamiliar. But Christ didn’t come to maintain our labels. He came to set us free from them.

“I Could Never Do That”

Maybe you’ve said it. Or heard it. “I’m just not the kind of person who could ever do that.” It could be about running a marathon, forgiving someone, starting over, or stepping into something scary but good. When we say those words, we’re reinforcing a label. A limit. And sometimes the only thing standing between us and growth is the story we’re telling ourselves.

What if, instead, we said, “I haven’t done that yet”? Or even more boldly, “With God’s help, I could.”

When Labels Mislead the Professionals

In one of the most famous psychological experiments of the 20th century, David Rosenhan and several others posed as psychiatric patients in 1972. They presented to different hospitals, claiming they heard a single word—“thud.” That was it. No other symptoms. And yet every one of them was admitted, diagnosed, and medicated.

They quickly said the symptom was gone and tried to act completely normal. But the staff couldn’t see past the labels. Only the other patients noticed something was off—they spotted the “fake” faster than the professionals did (Rosenhan, 1973).

Fast forward a few decades—author Lauren Slater (2004) tried something similar and was prescribed antipsychotics for a single vague symptom. The lesson? Once you’re labelled, it’s incredibly hard to be seen as anything else. That’s not just true in hospitals. It’s true in families, friendships, and workplaces too.

We All Want the Right Labels

Even celebrities hire teams to shape their public image. And social media? It’s become the PR department for the rest of us. A 2018 study (Holm & Samahita) found that many adults were willing to pay money to improve their online image. We all want to be seen a certain way. We all want labels that affirm, not diminish.

But what about the labels we give ourselves? Are they rooted in truth, or in pain?

“The world looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” — 1 Samuel 16:7

The Power of Positive Labels

Let me tell you a true story. A struggling student once received test results that (mistakenly) said he was gifted. Believing the label, he started excelling. Teachers saw him differently. He saw himself differently. He graduated with honors and landed a prestigious job. Only years later did the school realize it was a clerical error—his real score had been below average.

He was capable all along. But it was the label that helped unlock it.

Labels Can Be Self-Fulfilling

On the flip side, negative labels can act like a curse. Psychologist Sarah Tauber (1998) observed that labels often become self-fulfilling prophecies. If we call a child “lazy,” they may stop trying. If we say someone is “manipulative,” we might twist every interaction to prove it.

That’s why I believe our words—and our worldview—matter so deeply. As a Christian and a counselor, I see each person not as the sum of their symptoms, but as someone made in the image of God. We are more than our mental health diagnosis. More than our worst moment. More than the name others gave us—or the name we gave ourselves.

Don’t Let One “Thud” Define You

In the end, you’re not a diagnosis. Not a mistake. Not a personality type in a box.

You are God’s workmanship (Ephesians 2:10), created with purpose and possibility. You’ve been called by name, and the One who calls you doesn’t make errors or clerical mistakes.

So be mindful of your words. Watch how you speak about yourself. Label with care—and hope.

Because one “thud” doesn’t make you insane.

And one moment doesn’t define your whole life.

Want to explore this topic more deeply or reframe a label you’ve been carrying? I’d love to walk with you.

References

1. Carson, S., Langer, E. J., & Flodr, A. (2018). Remission vs. cure: the effects of labels on health and well-being. Manuscript in preparation.

2. Golub, S. A. (2004). Optimism, pessimism, and HIV risk behavior: Motivation or rationalization? Harvard University (PhD dissertation).

3. Rosenhan, D. L. (1973). On being sane in insane places.Science, 179(4070), 250-258.

4. Slater, L. (2005). Opening Skinner's Box. W W Norton & Co Ltd.

5. Holm, H. J., & Samahita, M. (2018). Curating social image: Experimental evidence on the value of actions and selfies.Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization, 148, 83.

6. Langer, E. J. (2000, July 1). Can words cure cancer? Psychology Today.

7. Tauber, R. T. (1998). Good or bad, what teachers expect from students they generally get! ERIC Digest.